Are God's Wrath Against Bad Kids
On the heels of his claim that ailing Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon is suffering the wrath of God for dividing the Holy Land, TV evangelist Pat Robertson today issued an ominous warning to the disobedient children of the world.
In a special homily delivered on Sunday at a Children's mass, Robertson said:
"Wicked youngsters who believe that God is too busy clotting the blood of fleshy Jewish leaders or planning the annihilation of imprudent Pennsylvania towns, simply do not understand the reach of God's wrath. For the scripture says: 'I will send an army of raincoat-clad, fetid men in slow-moving dark cars, armed with the forbidden fruit of jolly ranchers and peppermint schnapps, to cleanse the young population of its evilness.'"
The homily sent ripples through the congregation, as parents tried to reassure frightened children, and remove those who had loosed their bowels in fright.
Robertson continued:
"You can avoid the wrath of God if you listen to your parents. They know what is best for you, and can show you what is required to earn God's love. Choose to disobey, and you will wind up on a milk carton, you deviant little buggers."
In related news, insiders say that Satan is "feeling marginalized" by Robertson's continued insistence that God is behind most worldly catastrophes.
"He's having a bit of an identity crisis," explained one of his minions, who insisted on remaining anonymous despite the fact that the Head Imp is all-knowing. "If Robertson keeps giving God credit for all the evil stuff, where does that leave us? Satan hasn't felt this irrelevant since Christ held out for 40 days in the dessert. It's just not happy times for the dark side."
Webloafer's Note, This is a double track back, I found this article at the crazy blog site, The nose on your Face
You will enjoy both of these trackbacks.
Editor's Note: This post was written by TNOYF's Senior Correspondent Robert Potfry. Be sure to visit Robert's own site for more of his outstanding work.
posted by web_loafer at 9:03 AM
5 Comments:
oh me. I think Pat Robertson needs to retire. It's gotten embarassing.
Pat Robertson is the only one I know who prayed a Hurricane back into the ocean.
http://hurricaneprevention.org
luckily, his message isnt for the children of the world - only americans are stupid enough to watch this and actually take these kinds of idiots seriously.
You are more than welcome potfry, or is it potfree, potfury, or potluck, pottea, or just potfry?
I'll be checking your blog on a regular basis.
Oh my, I better go see if I linked to your blog, my readers will love your site.......Have you checked out my Original Blog....Sanity's Bluff?
I am going to do a little number on my help blog, on how to include links that work in comments. I stuggled with it for awhile until I figured it out.
I don't know who this moron is but coming from an Aussie Christian guy, this isn't God. This is some presumptious lunatic. You don't earn God's love, its just there. God IS love.
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